19 Tweets 79 reads Dec 01, 2020
Men must know how to tactfully deal with adversaries.
A thread on workplace diplomacy.
In every line of work, you will have people that will emerge as obstacles.
There's no competitive workplace that does not accommodate lies, jealousy, betrayal & resentment.
These are natural responses that are employed by people who fall short in the competence department.
Many say that you should not be afraid to confront those against you & just say what you think.
I've seen many stubborn men pay the price for this type of primitive thinking.
Truth is, diplomacy is a necessity, if you care about your reputation, leadership & your future.
To effectively address these 'enemies', you have to separate them into 3 types.
The Irritant - Gets under everyone's skin.
The Emotional - They inflict damage because they cant have what you have.
The Practical - They want something you have & they can get it.
The irritant in the workplace is very easy to identify. They are miserable, hate their job, & lack the ambition to do anything about it.
They show up & work for the weekend.
And naturally, when one reaches such dismal stage in life,
they'll seek to fulfil the void with drama.
The irritant starts drama with anyone. And finds other irritants to become good friends with.
Interacting with them brings no value. It is costly for your reputation & drags you to their level.
Better to absorb their attempt at annoying you through silence than addressing it.
The emotional enemy wants what you have but cant get it. This could be because they lack the credentials or cant obtain your specific knowledge.
They are usually driven by envy, which should ideally fuel contest for better worth ethic, but instead turns into resentment.
The emotional will lash out until they get a reaction out of you.
Limit interaction as much as you can & treat them like children. Not in a condescending way.
But cater to their emotions. Share fake vulnerabilities, elicit trust & never express enjoyment in your work.
The idea is to contain them. Share (fake) qualities that they value and lead them to believe that they are important.
If you don't microdose the emotional with their own poison, their resentment will only grow,
enough to jeopardise their position just to sabotage yours.
The practical enemy is the predatory type. They want what you have, and they have the means to take it off you.
They possess the competence, cunningness & ambition to get what they want.
If they are low on neuroticism, you wont see them coming.
They'll plan in silence.
To identify these types, first screen the organisation for those with your credentials, or those with your specialty.
Then locate them within the hierarchy; whether they are at your level or below.
In general, it'll be those below you that will come at you.
Then measure their competence & cunningness.
Do they work as hard as you? Amount of hours, degree of responsibility, their ability to generate profit.
If a practical enemy sets their eyes on you, you will have to stay on top of your peak performance at work.
Are they willing to break rules & be expedient?
A man who is willing to break rules & be expedient, cant imagine another man wouldn't.
This means he is expecting you to play dirty. And if you don't, you will lose.
The battle is played on 2 grounds:
Competence & cunningness.
Practical enemies are driven objectively. That means its not about you, its about what you have.
If you can address their interest by exchanging value, you can befriend them.
This is harder than it seems, especially if they're below you.
If you're both on the same level,
You need to find differences between the two of you, then provide value that helps him grow,
while getting value that helps you grow.
If he is below you, you have to provide value that diminishes his threat of coming after you.
If you want to eliminate the threat of a practical enemy, you have to take them under your wing,
and build their reputation. And do it loudly. You want people to know that you are working together.
You want to 'oversee' & 'look out' for them. Keep them nice & close.
Don't drop your performance while befriending them.
Maintain your positional power by outdoing everyone while at the same time, telling your new 'friend' that you're there to help & its okay to rest up.
This supportive behaviour will elicit complacency in them.
You want to emerge as a leader for them. That you acknowledge their ambition, & want to empower them,
build their reputation, but also look out for them.
Create an aura of comfort.
When they're drunk on empowerment at your will,
then you're in control. Not them.
If you maintain this relationship long term:
(exchange value, be supportive, build their reputation & show off alliance)
you will deteriorate the predatory element in your practical enemy. They will become your friend.
You will grow together,
with you in control.

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