How to stop being boring without being fake
- thread -
- thread -
Imagine this…
You are in a conversation.
The initial niceties are done.
But now the interaction is becoming boring.
You are furiously searching for some interesting topic to come up with
But the silence is already stretching toward awkwardness.
You are in a conversation.
The initial niceties are done.
But now the interaction is becoming boring.
You are furiously searching for some interesting topic to come up with
But the silence is already stretching toward awkwardness.
And this is one conversation that you cannot afford to go sideways.
But the damage is done.
You are now at a point of no return
This conversation can no longer be salvaged…
Furious with yourself, you excuse yourself and back out,
Another opportunity is gone into the drain.
But the damage is done.
You are now at a point of no return
This conversation can no longer be salvaged…
Furious with yourself, you excuse yourself and back out,
Another opportunity is gone into the drain.
Why can’t I be a bit more interesting - you scream at yourself.
You have no aptitude for those fake niceties or plastic smiles.
So are you doomed to be boring?
Is there any hope for you?
The answer - is a resounding YES.
You have no aptitude for those fake niceties or plastic smiles.
So are you doomed to be boring?
Is there any hope for you?
The answer - is a resounding YES.
There’s no inherently boring person.
Being interesting is a combination of skill and courage.
And it’s up for grabs for everyone who wants it badly enough.
So here’s what you need to do if you want to stop being boring without being fake:
Being interesting is a combination of skill and courage.
And it’s up for grabs for everyone who wants it badly enough.
So here’s what you need to do if you want to stop being boring without being fake:
1. Focus on your inner world
People become boring when they try too hard to impress others.
They talk about people they met, things they did, and places they went to.
But they forget to share the most interesting and unique thing about themselves.
Their own perspective.
People become boring when they try too hard to impress others.
They talk about people they met, things they did, and places they went to.
But they forget to share the most interesting and unique thing about themselves.
Their own perspective.
Summon the courage to share what was really going on within.
The guilt. The elation. The worries. The triumph. And even the shame.
People yearn for these raw, unfiltered emotions.
And the more you’re able to serve it to them, the more interesting you become.
The guilt. The elation. The worries. The triumph. And even the shame.
People yearn for these raw, unfiltered emotions.
And the more you’re able to serve it to them, the more interesting you become.
2. Bring some extra oomph
Here’s a good rule of thumb…
Come in with energy one level higher than it’s called for.
It will make you stand out immediately.
It will capture others’ attention.
They will focus on what you got to say.
Here’s a good rule of thumb…
Come in with energy one level higher than it’s called for.
It will make you stand out immediately.
It will capture others’ attention.
They will focus on what you got to say.
But does this mean you have to keep being the loud, boisterous guy, even if you don't want to?
Not at all.
No need to feel trapped.
Feel free to dial the tone down when you feel like it.
It makes the conversation more natural and interesting.
Not at all.
No need to feel trapped.
Feel free to dial the tone down when you feel like it.
It makes the conversation more natural and interesting.
3. Involve others
Do you know how best to get others interested in what you’re saying?
Make the conversation about them.
Tell them how what you’re saying relates back to them.
Prompt them to share their experience.
Do these and I promise you will become an attention magnet.
Do you know how best to get others interested in what you’re saying?
Make the conversation about them.
Tell them how what you’re saying relates back to them.
Prompt them to share their experience.
Do these and I promise you will become an attention magnet.
4. Tell a good story
Let me tell you about the most boring, yawn-inducing conversations ever...
They are the ones where someone drones on and on with a long winding story that no one cares about.
How do you avoid that?
Learn to tell a good story.
Let me tell you about the most boring, yawn-inducing conversations ever...
They are the ones where someone drones on and on with a long winding story that no one cares about.
How do you avoid that?
Learn to tell a good story.
A story is not just events stacked one after another.
It has emotional tension.
It has an element of mystery that gets resolved at the end.
And when you tell a good story, it prompts others to share their stories as well.
That’s the best way to make a conversation lively.
It has emotional tension.
It has an element of mystery that gets resolved at the end.
And when you tell a good story, it prompts others to share their stories as well.
That’s the best way to make a conversation lively.
5. To be interesting, do something interesting
Do you know the easiest way to not be boring?
Do something in your life that’s not boring.
Now I don't want to take up skydiving or go wrestle with great white sharks.
So what do I mean here?
Do you know the easiest way to not be boring?
Do something in your life that’s not boring.
Now I don't want to take up skydiving or go wrestle with great white sharks.
So what do I mean here?
Follow your passion.
Cram your free time with as many things as you find interesting.
Do not leave any regrets for your deathbed.
Maybe nothing will come out of it.
Or maybe it becomes your new career.
If nothing else, it will definitely make for an interesting conversation.
Cram your free time with as many things as you find interesting.
Do not leave any regrets for your deathbed.
Maybe nothing will come out of it.
Or maybe it becomes your new career.
If nothing else, it will definitely make for an interesting conversation.
6. Stop telling the bland, vanilla truth
Here’s a quick hack to make conversations interesting...
Be playful.
When someone asks you a question don’t just give literal answers.
Give an absurd answer.
Add some exaggeration.
Add some hyperbole.
Here’s a quick hack to make conversations interesting...
Be playful.
When someone asks you a question don’t just give literal answers.
Give an absurd answer.
Add some exaggeration.
Add some hyperbole.
You are not avoiding the answer here.
But before giving the real answer, why not have some fun?
And the best thing about this is?
When you do that you will find others are reciprocating your mood as well.
The conversation immediately becomes infinitely more interesting.
But before giving the real answer, why not have some fun?
And the best thing about this is?
When you do that you will find others are reciprocating your mood as well.
The conversation immediately becomes infinitely more interesting.
7. Do away with curt, one-word answers
Do you know the people who are the most frustrating to talk to?
It's people who put the entire pressure of the conversation on the others.
They give curt, one-word answers.
This leads to awkward silences and stalls.
Do you know the people who are the most frustrating to talk to?
It's people who put the entire pressure of the conversation on the others.
They give curt, one-word answers.
This leads to awkward silences and stalls.
So what do you do?
Give a detailed, engaged answer when you are asked something.
Then make space for the other person to speak as well.
Sharing your experience and doing a follow-up question is the best way to keep the conversation alive and engaged.
Give a detailed, engaged answer when you are asked something.
Then make space for the other person to speak as well.
Sharing your experience and doing a follow-up question is the best way to keep the conversation alive and engaged.
8. Stop being a passive listener
Talking to someone who is too passive can be incredibly boring and frustrating.
You know the people I’m talking about...
People who don’t give any reaction.
They censor and guard their every expression
Talking to someone who is too passive can be incredibly boring and frustrating.
You know the people I’m talking about...
People who don’t give any reaction.
They censor and guard their every expression
Here are two easy tactics to avoid this.
Mirror other people.
It can be copying their stance, their gestures, or even mirroring the last few words of their sentences.
It feels awkward when you do this at first.
But soon, it will come naturally to you.
Mirror other people.
It can be copying their stance, their gestures, or even mirroring the last few words of their sentences.
It feels awkward when you do this at first.
But soon, it will come naturally to you.
Another thing that you can do is give emotional reactions.
Give a literal guffaw when they say something funny.
If you can make others feel smart or funny, you have got them in the palm of your hand.
They will come back to you again and again for that fix.
Give a literal guffaw when they say something funny.
If you can make others feel smart or funny, you have got them in the palm of your hand.
They will come back to you again and again for that fix.
Anyone can be interesting.
This gift is not meant for a select few with talent.
It’s up for grabs for everyone with awareness, honesty, and focus.
This gift is not meant for a select few with talent.
It’s up for grabs for everyone with awareness, honesty, and focus.
What makes a person interesting is not the number of mountains he has scaled or the seabeds he has touched.
It depends on their courage to share what exactly going on within them.
And it depends on their ability to infuse energy, passion, and playfulness into the conversion.
It depends on their courage to share what exactly going on within them.
And it depends on their ability to infuse energy, passion, and playfulness into the conversion.
People crave this kind of authentic connection.
They want to feel a little less alone.
Do that and you will have the holy grail of being interesting in every conversation.
And you can do that without being fake.
They want to feel a little less alone.
Do that and you will have the holy grail of being interesting in every conversation.
And you can do that without being fake.
I'm looking for a few more people in their 30s-40s who want to become ASSERTIVE and SECURE in their relationships in 12 weeks.
Without spending time and energy on trial and error.
Secure your spot here 👇
resilienthuman.me
Without spending time and energy on trial and error.
Secure your spot here 👇
resilienthuman.me
If you liked this thread do me 2 favors:
1. Follow me for more @resilientthuman
2. Retweet the top Tweet
I will not rest until everyone learns to ask what they deserve without guilt and shame.
Join me.
1. Follow me for more @resilientthuman
2. Retweet the top Tweet
I will not rest until everyone learns to ask what they deserve without guilt and shame.
Join me.
Loading suggestions...