An enormous review—105 studies; over 70k people—found that valuing external validation and outcomes over internal rewards and satisfaction was associated with negative wellbeing.
Seeking fame or money (above a certain threshold) makes you worse off.
Here’s what makes you well:
Seeking fame or money (above a certain threshold) makes you worse off.
Here’s what makes you well:
Autonomy:
At least some control over how you spend your time and energy.
This is why the most successful people don’t want you to know they are successful. They want to retain intimacy and control over their lives.
At least some control over how you spend your time and energy.
This is why the most successful people don’t want you to know they are successful. They want to retain intimacy and control over their lives.
Mastery:
A sense of concrete progress, improvement, and growth that can be traced back to the effort you put in.
This is why carpenters, writers, and artists are often happier than corporate managers. (Especially true at highly political and dysfunctional organizations!)
A sense of concrete progress, improvement, and growth that can be traced back to the effort you put in.
This is why carpenters, writers, and artists are often happier than corporate managers. (Especially true at highly political and dysfunctional organizations!)
Belonging:
Connection to something greater than yourself—be it a community, cause, team, organization, or tradition.
Fame and money are pretty ego-driven. But with ego comes a whole lot of worry and navel-gazing and perceived threat aversion. Not fun! Get beyond yourself!
Connection to something greater than yourself—be it a community, cause, team, organization, or tradition.
Fame and money are pretty ego-driven. But with ego comes a whole lot of worry and navel-gazing and perceived threat aversion. Not fun! Get beyond yourself!
Health:
Sacrificing physical or mental health now to chase some goal that you *think* will make you happy or healthy later almost never works. It’s a trap!
Progress is great, but make it sustainable. Your health isn’t a price to pay.
Sacrificing physical or mental health now to chase some goal that you *think* will make you happy or healthy later almost never works. It’s a trap!
Progress is great, but make it sustainable. Your health isn’t a price to pay.
Meaning:
It is better to do work that is in alignment with your core values than it is to chase arbitrary numbers on a scoreboard.
External scoreboards are fine but internal scoreboards are more important. Explains why many investment bankers report poor wellbeing.
It is better to do work that is in alignment with your core values than it is to chase arbitrary numbers on a scoreboard.
External scoreboards are fine but internal scoreboards are more important. Explains why many investment bankers report poor wellbeing.
Know what game you are playing and why you are playing it.
Strive for autonomy, mastery, and belonging.
Do not sacrifice your health.
Live in alignment with your values.
Strive for autonomy, mastery, and belonging.
Do not sacrifice your health.
Live in alignment with your values.
For more tweets and threads like this, follow @BStulberg.
For a deep dive on the psychology of excellence and better ways to define and pursue success, check out The Practice of Groundedness. All evidence based and actionable:
amazon.com
For a deep dive on the psychology of excellence and better ways to define and pursue success, check out The Practice of Groundedness. All evidence based and actionable:
amazon.com
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