It’s time we accept that what is killing marriages today is too much sins.
You’ve been accumulating sins when you were dating, you accumulated during pre wedding nonsense, you accumulated during the wedding, you accumulated post wedding, and you think Allah would allow that

Union to survive when you supposedly married in His name and for His sake?
Yakamata mu duba.
Let us ask our parents and grandparents, how they survived 40plus years of marriages.
And ask ourselves what are we doing differently?
Are we marrying our wives according to the dictates

Of the sunnah?
Some of the things we’re doing during weddings, does someone has to tell us it is totally wrong and we’re sinning against ourselves?
And if we really cared about good offsprings, would we engage in acts that will condemn them even before they’re born?
Mu duba.

One of the effects of sins ibn qayyim rh mentioned was a woman disobeying her husband because of sins he has accumulated, while he on the other hand disrespects and not values her because of sins she’s accumulated.
This is all fused when they sinned together, babu zaman Lafiya.