💡🤝💪Being mentored by someone ahead of you can change your whole trajectory, but there are good and bad ways to do it.
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Here are the main things to do—and avoid doing—when contacting and working with a mentor.
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Here are the main things to do—and avoid doing—when contacting and working with a mentor.
1. 😬Don’t overuse flattery
Too much admiration will turn off most mentors. Less is more.
- Don’t put yourself in the fan-zone
- You’re a future them, not a worm
- Too much says you won’t be willing to work
Too much admiration will turn off most mentors. Less is more.
- Don’t put yourself in the fan-zone
- You’re a future them, not a worm
- Too much says you won’t be willing to work
2. 🎯Ask something specific
Most mentors are busy, so respect their time with a clean ask.
- Just saying hello gives them work
- Make it easy to respond
- Ask something interesting or provoking
TRY: “Would you suggest a first elective in data science or in business writing?”
Most mentors are busy, so respect their time with a clean ask.
- Just saying hello gives them work
- Make it easy to respond
- Ask something interesting or provoking
TRY: “Would you suggest a first elective in data science or in business writing?”
3. 💪Behave like a future peer
There’s a night-day difference between hearing from a junior version of yourself vs. someone looking to score points.
- Respect is good, but don’t overdo it
TRY: “I am looking to follow something like your path, and I have a question about….”
There’s a night-day difference between hearing from a junior version of yourself vs. someone looking to score points.
- Respect is good, but don’t overdo it
TRY: “I am looking to follow something like your path, and I have a question about….”
4. 🧹Show that you’ve already done work
Mentors are more likely to help other hustlers like them as opposed to someone they think won’t follow through.
- Mention what worked and didn’t work
TRY: “I’ve already tried A and B, and C , and I'm thinking D might work?…”
Mentors are more likely to help other hustlers like them as opposed to someone they think won’t follow through.
- Mention what worked and didn’t work
TRY: “I’ve already tried A and B, and C , and I'm thinking D might work?…”
5. 🔍Ask for an opinion on something you’ve created
This one combines #2 and #4 by showing that you’ve done work and asking something specific about it.
- Provide a short video or paragraph
- Make it easy to consume
TRY: “I made this. What is your first impression…”
This one combines #2 and #4 by showing that you’ve done work and asking something specific about it.
- Provide a short video or paragraph
- Make it easy to consume
TRY: “I made this. What is your first impression…”
6. 🔬Offer an improvement or constructive comment on something they’ve made
Nothing beats offering value to show that you’re someone to take seriously.
TRY: “Loved your latest article. I’ve done a bunch of reading on the topic myself recently and I think…”
Nothing beats offering value to show that you’re someone to take seriously.
TRY: “Loved your latest article. I’ve done a bunch of reading on the topic myself recently and I think…”
7. 🔥 Produce something remarkable
The absolute best way to get noticed is to actually produce something noteworthy within your shared space.
- Security Testing: Create a tool that’s useful
- Writing: Write an article that people enjoy
GREAT: “I made this thing and…”
The absolute best way to get noticed is to actually produce something noteworthy within your shared space.
- Security Testing: Create a tool that’s useful
- Writing: Write an article that people enjoy
GREAT: “I made this thing and…”
📄 Summary
1. Avoid too much flattery
2. Be respectful of their time by being concise and specific
3. Behave like a peer
4. Show that you’ve done work already
5. Show them something you’ve built
6. Provide some kind of value
7. Produce something tangible and useful
1. Avoid too much flattery
2. Be respectful of their time by being concise and specific
3. Behave like a peer
4. Show that you’ve done work already
5. Show them something you’ve built
6. Provide some kind of value
7. Produce something tangible and useful
🎁To get this whole thing in one place, plus more context and examples, here’s a full blog post on the topic.
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danielmiessler.com
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