I recently came across an article written by a young father with terminal cancer.
Its message is deeply moving and inspiring.
Here’s the powerful lesson everyone needs to hear:
Its message is deeply moving and inspiring.
Here’s the powerful lesson everyone needs to hear:
Jonathan Tjarks was one of the first writers hired by The Ringer.
In 2021, shortly after the birth of his first son, he was diagnosed with a rare and deadly form of cancer.
In the emotional piece entitled “Does My Son Know You?”, he reflects on his diagnosis and his son’s life:
In 2021, shortly after the birth of his first son, he was diagnosed with a rare and deadly form of cancer.
In the emotional piece entitled “Does My Son Know You?”, he reflects on his diagnosis and his son’s life:
His son, Jackson, had just turned 1 at the time of the diagnosis.
“Being a dad has been the greatest joy of my life. I was never someone who debated about whether or not to have a family. It’s something that I had wanted ever since I was a kid. I wanted what I didn’t have.”
“Being a dad has been the greatest joy of my life. I was never someone who debated about whether or not to have a family. It’s something that I had wanted ever since I was a kid. I wanted what I didn’t have.”
Jonathan’s father had been diagnosed with Parkinson’s when he was just 6-years-old.
His father had been unable to be present in his life due to the disease.
He passed away when Jonathan was 21.
At the funeral, Jonathan noticed something:
His father had been unable to be present in his life due to the disease.
He passed away when Jonathan was 21.
At the funeral, Jonathan noticed something:
His father's friends, who had been there for Jonathan in the early years after the diagnosis, had slowly lost touch.
At the funeral, they offered support, but Jonathan had a realization:
"All I could think was I don’t know any of you. I know of you...But I don’t know you."
At the funeral, they offered support, but Jonathan had a realization:
"All I could think was I don’t know any of you. I know of you...But I don’t know you."
Reflecting on the meaning of this for his own dire situation, Jonathan is inspired to make sure his son never feels this same emotion.
So he begins investing deliberately in the relationships with his friends—those he wants to be *really be there* for his son when he is gone.
So he begins investing deliberately in the relationships with his friends—those he wants to be *really be there* for his son when he is gone.
The passage that hit me hardest:
"I have already told some of my friends: When I see you in heaven, there’s only one thing I’m going to ask—Were you good to my son and my wife? Were you there for them? Does my son know you?"
(continued)
"I have already told some of my friends: When I see you in heaven, there’s only one thing I’m going to ask—Were you good to my son and my wife? Were you there for them? Does my son know you?"
(continued)
"I want [my son] to wonder why his dad’s friends always come over and shoot hoops with him. Why they always invite him to their houses. Why there are so many of them at his games. I hope that he gets sick of them."
Gut punch.
Gut punch.
The full article can be found here. It's the most powerful piece I have read in years.
Read it with your loved ones—think deeply about the relationships you want to invest in.
Love is all you have in the end. theringer.com
Read it with your loved ones—think deeply about the relationships you want to invest in.
Love is all you have in the end. theringer.com
Sadly, Jonathan Tjarks passed away in September.
He is survived by his wife, Melissa, and his son, Jackson, who will turn three in March.
I have donated to support his family here. If you feel so moved, join me. gofundme.com
He is survived by his wife, Melissa, and his son, Jackson, who will turn three in March.
I have donated to support his family here. If you feel so moved, join me. gofundme.com
As I leave this morning on my first real trip away from my young son, I felt this on so many levels.
To all of my friends and loved ones:
I expect my son to KNOW you.
To all of my friends and loved ones:
I expect my son to KNOW you.
And I’ll repeat the powerful reminder:
The days are long but the years are short.
The days are long but the years are short.
I’m thrilled to see the donations rolling in for the Tjarks family.
I’ll be even more thrilled if each donation comes with a commitment to *really be there* for someone in your life.
That’s the legacy of Jonathan’s words.
I’ll be even more thrilled if each donation comes with a commitment to *really be there* for someone in your life.
That’s the legacy of Jonathan’s words.
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