The best parenting advice I've ever gotten.
From some of history’s greatest thinkers and parents:
From some of history’s greatest thinkers and parents:
1/ When your child offers you a hand to hold, take it.
That’s a rule I picked up from @EconTalker. You might be tired, you might be busy, you might be on the other line—but whenever they reach out, whenever they offer you a hand to hold, take the opportunity.
That’s a rule I picked up from @EconTalker. You might be tired, you might be busy, you might be on the other line—but whenever they reach out, whenever they offer you a hand to hold, take the opportunity.
2/ There is no such thing as “quality” time
@JerrySeinfeld says that garbage time—eating cereal together late at night, laying around on the couch—is the best time.
On my desk, I keep a medallion that says Tempus Fugit (“time flies”) and “all time is quality time” on the back.
@JerrySeinfeld says that garbage time—eating cereal together late at night, laying around on the couch—is the best time.
On my desk, I keep a medallion that says Tempus Fugit (“time flies”) and “all time is quality time” on the back.
3/ You’re hangry
In 2014, Researchers from @OhioState University found that most fights between couples are because someone is hungry.
When you’re grouchy and frustrated and anxious and short with your spouse and your kids—you might just be hangry.
In 2014, Researchers from @OhioState University found that most fights between couples are because someone is hungry.
When you’re grouchy and frustrated and anxious and short with your spouse and your kids—you might just be hangry.
4/ Just be.
One time I was in the pool with my wife. “Should we fill up the rafts?” I asked. “Here help me dump out the filter.” There was a bunch of that from me.
“You know you can just be in the pool,” she said.
Now when I’m with my kids, I remind myself, just be with them.
One time I was in the pool with my wife. “Should we fill up the rafts?” I asked. “Here help me dump out the filter.” There was a bunch of that from me.
“You know you can just be in the pool,” she said.
Now when I’m with my kids, I remind myself, just be with them.
5/ A child’s life should be good, not easy
There’s a famous Latin expression: Luctor et Emergo. “I struggle and emerge” or “wrestle with and overcome.”
Without struggle, Seneca says, “no one will know what you were capable of, not even yourself.”
There’s a famous Latin expression: Luctor et Emergo. “I struggle and emerge” or “wrestle with and overcome.”
Without struggle, Seneca says, “no one will know what you were capable of, not even yourself.”
6/ Be demanding and supportive
From @angeladuckw: “The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.”
From @angeladuckw: “The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.”
7/ Go the f*ck to sleep
That’s the advice of a book I love to read to my kids: Go the F*ck to Sleep! Morning routines are great but a bedtime routine is maybe more important.
That’s the advice of a book I love to read to my kids: Go the F*ck to Sleep! Morning routines are great but a bedtime routine is maybe more important.
8/ Carve out “two sacred hours”
@jamesclear told me that when he became a father, he carved out “two sacred hours” in the morning to do his writing. Sometimes he gets more, but never less.
Sacred time is important. You have to carve it out.
@jamesclear told me that when he became a father, he carved out “two sacred hours” in the morning to do his writing. Sometimes he gets more, but never less.
Sacred time is important. You have to carve it out.
9/ Pick two
I asked @austinkleon how he makes time for it all. “I don’t,” he said. “The artist’s life is about tradeoffs.”
He follows this rule that we should keep with us: Work, family, scene. Pick two.
I asked @austinkleon how he makes time for it all. “I don’t,” he said. “The artist’s life is about tradeoffs.”
He follows this rule that we should keep with us: Work, family, scene. Pick two.
10/ Your living is the teaching
Socrates’ students said of their teacher that for all the genius he possessed, Plato and Aristotle and all the other sages who learned from him “derived more benefit from [his] character than [his] words.”
Socrates’ students said of their teacher that for all the genius he possessed, Plato and Aristotle and all the other sages who learned from him “derived more benefit from [his] character than [his] words.”
11/ Make fast transitions
From Randall Stutman: “If you need to settle yourself and sit in your car before you walk in the house so you can now be Dad, then that’s what you need to do….your job is not to walk into the house and carry with you anything that came from before.”
From Randall Stutman: “If you need to settle yourself and sit in your car before you walk in the house so you can now be Dad, then that’s what you need to do….your job is not to walk into the house and carry with you anything that came from before.”
12/ Everything you say YES is saying NO to something else
Being a parent is about making tradeoffs: It’s their needs versus our wants.
At first, it can be a shock to the system. But once we know what to say no to, we can say yes with confidence to the things that matter.
Being a parent is about making tradeoffs: It’s their needs versus our wants.
At first, it can be a shock to the system. But once we know what to say no to, we can say yes with confidence to the things that matter.
That’s some of the best parenting advice I’ve ever gotten from conversations on the @dailystoic podcast, reading, and interactions with other ordinary people.
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If you enjoyed this:
1. Follow @ryanholiday for more.
2. Share this thread with parents who might also enjoy it.
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Every morning, I send a short email with one piece of timeless parenting advice from history, science, literature and other ordinary parents.
Subscribe here: dailydad.com
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