A thing about being some sort of public figure or having an audience is that you increasingly bump up against people who dislike you. The knee-jerk thing you’ll often hear about this is something like “ignore the haters”, but as I’ve said before, that’s a non-trivial directive
more on that here, but that’s not actually what I want to focus on rn
thing is- ok so you’ve played your cards right and succeeded at something well enough that thousands of people like you, appreciate your work, tell you lovely stories about how you’ve helped them – that is truly wonderful and I highly recommend it – but…
it doesn’t actually always remove the sting of rejection, disapproval, insult, etc etc
this is one of those things you’re not really “supposed” to talk about. you’re supposed to pretend to be tough and unfazed. presenting weakness invites more bullying and mockery
but:
this is one of those things you’re not really “supposed” to talk about. you’re supposed to pretend to be tough and unfazed. presenting weakness invites more bullying and mockery
but:
it’s interesting to revisit what I was saying in 2020 – I completely stand by it, I was crossing some threshold then which now feels like several stages behind, I deal with much more today (both good and bad) than I did then, and I suppose what I’d add now is it gets wilder
I’ve always been a student of fame and culture and so I’ve always had my eyes open about how these things play out and I’m very careful about the path I walk
but still I guess there’s always an uncrossable, incommunicable chasm between studying the path and walking the path
but still I guess there’s always an uncrossable, incommunicable chasm between studying the path and walking the path
and as you continue walking the path you see new things & feel new things and you start to have concerns & considerations that you couldn’t even have imagined at the start. Is it that I couldn’t imagine being sad while being awash in love and admiration? no, that’s not quite it..
the funny thing is I have all the right words from past utterances but they resonate in a different way now.
(Aside: I don’t intend any of this to be discouraging to anyone. I love where I am in life, I’d do it again, and I still intend to do it harder in the coming decades)
(Aside: I don’t intend any of this to be discouraging to anyone. I love where I am in life, I’d do it again, and I still intend to do it harder in the coming decades)
I’m not sure what it is I’m working up to. I have a lot of feelings. It’s messy & complicated to be a person. It gets messier to be perceived in fragments by more ppl than u can count. still it feels like my calling in life. Managing that artfully is a psychological extreme sport
I guess I am reminding myself that I am a person. It’s easy to get swept up in managing the fragments. If success is dehumanizing then it is on us too to rehumanize ourselves, first of all within ourselves before we start worrying about how others perceive us
and ah here I get to what I think is one of the big knotty misunderstandings of social life, a sort of paradox in the vortex of caring vs not-caring. Care too much you’re needy. Care too little you’re a psychopath. Care precisely the right amount you’re calculating, insincere
you really might as well be yourself. but people will be so mad about it. and shouldn’t you listen to feedback? or are you a monster? lol
it’s tricky! again, psychological extreme sport. it’s like racing an F1 car with your soul
it’s tricky! again, psychological extreme sport. it’s like racing an F1 car with your soul
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