Women are more likely to set aside looks for other traits than men but from my observation they very much care about it.
It's well known in dating communities tall, handsome guys have a completely different experience than other men - even if their game isn't anything special.

Where we're talking past each other is the role looks plays. Way more important for women in casual liasons; not as much in long term romantic commitment.
Men in contrast struggle to commit to women who don't meet their physical threshold, but are more likely to sleep "down"