Masculinity is in crisis (this time) because femininity is in crisis.
There are many reasons for this, & one the worst is that we've started viewing men and women as competing material classes, rather than interdependent, inseparable aspects of a single ecology.
There are many reasons for this, & one the worst is that we've started viewing men and women as competing material classes, rather than interdependent, inseparable aspects of a single ecology.
Justice means balance, stewardship, and wise restraint, not one sex dominating the other.
When you hurt women, you hurt yourself. When you hurt men, you hurt yourself.
You can't win the battle of the sexes. You can, however, declare yourself a conscientious objector.
When you hurt women, you hurt yourself. When you hurt men, you hurt yourself.
You can't win the battle of the sexes. You can, however, declare yourself a conscientious objector.
Currently, no one has a compelling vision for gender relations that can get enough buy-in to move us forward. No one's even trying.
If you want to make a difference, you have to forsake the culture war and start building a sexual politics at the scale of your everyday life.
If you want to make a difference, you have to forsake the culture war and start building a sexual politics at the scale of your everyday life.
It won't look like anything like the sociopathic hypocrisy of liberal feminism or the dickbrained hysterics of the manosphere.
It will look like a bespoke console of intimate relationships, built around you and your loved ones' desires, wounds, and unique circumstances.
It will look like a bespoke console of intimate relationships, built around you and your loved ones' desires, wounds, and unique circumstances.
You're going to need worthy collaborators, which means they'll think for themselves, they won't always agree with you and they definitely won't treat you with kid gloves.
But they will accept you as you are, see the best in you, and be willing to sacrifice for your well-being.
But they will accept you as you are, see the best in you, and be willing to sacrifice for your well-being.
You'll have to make difficult, unsexy compromises. The score will never feel settled. In fact, you'll have to stop keeping it at all.
You'll have to become tougher than you ever imagined, and be far more tender than you ever believed you could.
You'll have to become tougher than you ever imagined, and be far more tender than you ever believed you could.
I assure you that you can do this, and that it is vastly preferable to the status quo.
The moment you accept that you can't get everything you desire is the moment your desires become possible.
Good luck to us all.
The moment you accept that you can't get everything you desire is the moment your desires become possible.
Good luck to us all.
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