You don’t need to feel good to get going; you need to get going to give yourself a chance at feeling good.
A big misconception is that you need to be motivated to get rolling.
You don't.
Research shows that motivation FOLLOWS action, not the other way around.
A big misconception is that you need to be motivated to get rolling.
You don't.
Research shows that motivation FOLLOWS action, not the other way around.
You cannot control your thoughts or feelings. Though many think otherwise, it's impossible.
(Close your eyes for the next thirty seconds, try not to think of a pink bear, and see what happens.)
What you can control is how you respond to your thoughts and feelings—your actions.
(Close your eyes for the next thirty seconds, try not to think of a pink bear, and see what happens.)
What you can control is how you respond to your thoughts and feelings—your actions.
Behavioral activation—science speak for getting started even if you don't feel like it—is one of the best ways to work through apathy and low energy.
There is a strong inertia to thinking and feeling. Actions help to break it, so long as they are skillful.
There is a strong inertia to thinking and feeling. Actions help to break it, so long as they are skillful.
The extreme example of clinical depression is useful.
For many, it manifests as a feeling of nothing mattering, fatigue, and a meaninglessness so bad it's painful.
But depression hates a moving target.
For many, it manifests as a feeling of nothing mattering, fatigue, and a meaninglessness so bad it's painful.
But depression hates a moving target.
It's not easy to force yourself to get going, whether you are experiencing depression, in a rut, or merely feeling off, wanting to hit the sleep button on life.
It takes a lot of self-discipline.
Which means it takes a lot of self-compassion, too.
Not one or the other. Both.
It takes a lot of self-discipline.
Which means it takes a lot of self-compassion, too.
Not one or the other. Both.
Self-discipline takes you to the hard places. It offers the firm persistance to keep going.
Self-compassion is what gives you courage when you are at the gates and what helps you rise up when you fall.
And then self-discipline gets you moving forward again.
Self-compassion is what gives you courage when you are at the gates and what helps you rise up when you fall.
And then self-discipline gets you moving forward again.
When you feel down or unmotivated, give yourself permission to feel those feelings but do not dwell on them or take them as destiny.
Shift the focus to getting started with what you have planned in front of you, taking your feelings, whatever they may be, along for the ride.
Shift the focus to getting started with what you have planned in front of you, taking your feelings, whatever they may be, along for the ride.
Sometimes you need more activation energy, sometimes you need less.
But the more you get going, the easier it becomes. Just as apathy has an inertia that builds on itself, action does too—it just takes some extra work to overcome the initial stasis and friction.
But the more you get going, the easier it becomes. Just as apathy has an inertia that builds on itself, action does too—it just takes some extra work to overcome the initial stasis and friction.
Keep showing up, even—and perhaps especially—when you don't want to.
A gentle yet firm persistance is the name of the game.
To learn more about behavioral activation and how to make it a habit, check out my new book, from which this post was excerpted:
amazon.com
A gentle yet firm persistance is the name of the game.
To learn more about behavioral activation and how to make it a habit, check out my new book, from which this post was excerpted:
amazon.com
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