ADHDers often have times of intense, hyperfocused productivity—getting things done in a fraction of the expected time.
But this paints a false picture of your “normal.”
So the all-too-familiar “not living up to your potential” haunts you whenever you fall short of perfection.
But this paints a false picture of your “normal.”
So the all-too-familiar “not living up to your potential” haunts you whenever you fall short of perfection.
We get stuck in the same thinking that plagued us as kids.
Like the teacher that saw us perform well in some areas, and said we were "capable of so much more" when we fell out of those areas of interest and our work suffered.
Like the teacher that saw us perform well in some areas, and said we were "capable of so much more" when we fell out of those areas of interest and our work suffered.
The blame seemed to be on us for not trying or caring enough.
So why do we do the same thing to ourselves, blaming ourselves?
It's not about caring or trying hard or any of that—we know we try harder than most, care more than anyone realizes.
So why do we do the same thing to ourselves, blaming ourselves?
It's not about caring or trying hard or any of that—we know we try harder than most, care more than anyone realizes.
I think it mostly comes down to acceptance.
Accepting who we are, and knowing that our most productive selves come in waves.
Waves usually centered around passion, interest, and urgency.
Accepting who we are, and knowing that our most productive selves come in waves.
Waves usually centered around passion, interest, and urgency.
Sometimes we won't be at the top of our game, and that's okay.
Be compassionate with yourself, know that it isn't a moral failing to struggle with work that "should be easy."
Be compassionate with yourself, know that it isn't a moral failing to struggle with work that "should be easy."
And try to stop "shoulding" yourself.
By saying that something "should" be easy, simple, or whatever, we're setting ourselves up to feel bad or guilty about not being able to do it.
Guilt is a lousy motivator.
By saying that something "should" be easy, simple, or whatever, we're setting ourselves up to feel bad or guilty about not being able to do it.
Guilt is a lousy motivator.
When those waves of high productivity show up—hold on tight!
Use the momentum to tackle those ambitions and exciting projects you've been dreaming about (and probably talking about) starting!
Appreciate the thrill of the roller coaster now moving downhill at full speed.
Use the momentum to tackle those ambitions and exciting projects you've been dreaming about (and probably talking about) starting!
Appreciate the thrill of the roller coaster now moving downhill at full speed.
Ultimately, the key to overcoming the "not living up to your potential" mentality is self-acceptance and self-compassion.
Embrace your unique self, and the strengths and challenges that are part of your story.
Embrace your unique self, and the strengths and challenges that are part of your story.
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