I disappeared from the world for a year and focused on myself, my healing, and personal development.
Here's how:
Here's how:
In 2016, I reached a low point in my life.
I felt unfulfilled with my work and dreaded Mondays. I could barely get out of bed. I had a series of toxic relationships and even fantasized about packing my bags and leaving the country.
I had to change.
I felt unfulfilled with my work and dreaded Mondays. I could barely get out of bed. I had a series of toxic relationships and even fantasized about packing my bags and leaving the country.
I had to change.
I decided I was going to concentrate on myself and put myself first. Something I never did in my adult life.
Of course, this wasn't easy because I was deeply codependent and learned self betrayal as love.
Of course, this wasn't easy because I was deeply codependent and learned self betrayal as love.
Here's the changes I made:
1. I started a sleep schedule: I put myself to bed by 10 pm every night and woke myself up at 6 am. It took me a while, but soon my body responded naturally. Proper sleep is a game changer.
Highly recommend this book:
1. I started a sleep schedule: I put myself to bed by 10 pm every night and woke myself up at 6 am. It took me a while, but soon my body responded naturally. Proper sleep is a game changer.
Highly recommend this book:
2. I journaled every morning: I created something called The Future Self Journal. I used to every day to live into new emotional states. It changed my life.
You can get it free here: theholisticpsychologist.com
You can get it free here: theholisticpsychologist.com
3. I moved my body every single day: I used youtube as my gym (to save money) and did yoga classes, high intensity workouts, or sprints
I loved progressing with 30 day challenge hosted by Adriene.
Here's her channel: youtube.com
I loved progressing with 30 day challenge hosted by Adriene.
Here's her channel: youtube.com
4. I started looking at, and healing my childhood trauma: I became conscious to my family dynamics and how they lived within me. I did this from a space of self witnessing-- just noticing myself and my habit reactions from a space of curiosity (not judgement)
5. I set boundaries: I didn't have any boundaries until my early 30s. So naturally I felt resentful and burnt out in my relationships. I set them even though it was scary and sometimes people were disappointed.
6. I spent tons of time learning: I devoured books and podcasts (mostly about psychology, healing, and spirituality.) I learned all about the nervous system, polyvagal theory, and the subconscious mind.
I applied and practiced everything I learned.
I applied and practiced everything I learned.
7. I started speaking about myself in new ways. Language matters, most importantly the words that come after "I am..."
I chose to tell a new, empowering story about myself.
I chose to tell a new, empowering story about myself.
8. I learned new skills: I had an education (a doctorate in psychology) but I had to humble myself to the reality that I lacked skills needed for the modern world. I learned: content creation, social media, financial awareness etc.
I didn't do all of these changes at once. I actually made a small promise every day. I started out with journaling. Once I kept the promise for 30 days, I added another.
I wish I could say I went into these changes with excitement, but I didn't.
To be honest, I self-victimized. I pitied myself. I had lots of 'negative' thoughts. More than once I broke down in tears. I hated being uncomfortable.
To be honest, I self-victimized. I pitied myself. I had lots of 'negative' thoughts. More than once I broke down in tears. I hated being uncomfortable.
But, I was miserable in life as I knew it, and I knew it was time for me to learn how to be ok with discomfort. I kept showing up.
And over the course of a year, I transformed.
Not just physically. The true transformation was spiritual.
And over the course of a year, I transformed.
Not just physically. The true transformation was spiritual.
I had taken a long hard look at myself. The self I had been running from. I realized I was emotionally immature, and I would need to become a parent to myself.
It was humbling. I would need to re-raise myself.
And that's what I did.
It was humbling. I would need to re-raise myself.
And that's what I did.
A year later I emerged as a new person.
If you would have told that past version of myself I would be a #1 New York Times bestselling author or that I would create and run a global community of people in over 100 countries, I wouldn't have believed it.
If you would have told that past version of myself I would be a #1 New York Times bestselling author or that I would create and run a global community of people in over 100 countries, I wouldn't have believed it.
Am I special? No. We we all have the ability to heal and transform.
We just have to show up.
That's the 'secret.' Small steps every day. Saying no to the dysfunctional norms of society. Having the courage to be the black sheep who breaks cycles.
We just have to show up.
That's the 'secret.' Small steps every day. Saying no to the dysfunctional norms of society. Having the courage to be the black sheep who breaks cycles.
And most importantly, giving back as you do it.
The more you give, the more you receive.
The more you give, the more you receive.
Here's your permission to disappear to heal. In one year from now, you'll look in the mirror and you'll be shocked at who you see.
If you found this helpful follow: @Theholisticpsyc
I write threads every day on how to heal yourself.
SelfHealers Circle my global healing community opens today. Join the waitlist here: theholisticpsychologist.com
My new workbook:
howtomeetyourself.com
I write threads every day on how to heal yourself.
SelfHealers Circle my global healing community opens today. Join the waitlist here: theholisticpsychologist.com
My new workbook:
howtomeetyourself.com
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