Arts Child development Education Parenting
Saiswaroopa Iyer
Saiswaroopa Iyer

@Sai_swaroopa

11 tweets 53 reads Sep 09, 2024
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Saw a video about a child dancing for a school programme dressed in a costume that's apallingly off the mark for any educational institution.
Let me share an incident that's happened to us. Last year, my daughter's class too was taught a dance to perform on their annual day++
++The song was a typical 90s bollywood medley. The lyrics had nothing objectionable though I was slightly uncomfortable with the near romantic theme. But till the d day, we had no clue of the costume till the children appeared on the stage.
Husband & I were shocked at the sight++
++ we took it up with the teacher who casually said, "it's ok sir, they are small kids."
I said "exactly mam! They are small kids which is why it's NOT OK!"
Apparently we were the only parents objecting to the costume and we were advised to look at what the other "top" schools+
++ did for their Annual day.
I tried talking to other parents and realised I was the lone voice though they felt equally uncomfortable.
"Just one day no?"
"All forty kids on stage... So nothing 'very' objectionable."
I said "normalise it once and can you blame the kids++
++if they want to wear a similar dress when they are 13+?"
I could see many felt my pain but were clueless about what action to take. It was too late to seek admission elsewhere. So we let her continue there for the next year but did not let her to participate in any programs++
++ that year and then changed the school this year.
During the interview I showed the pic to the new principal and told her "I came here because you value Indian civilization culture but any misstep like this coatume, we wont allow it."
The new school thankfully shares our++
++concerns and assured us they wouldn't allow such songs or dance in the first place. We told this exact reason to the old school also.
This change of school is one decision we wont ever regret.
All the while I felt if I were put on the stage at that age in that costume++
++ my mother would have disrupted the programme, shamed the management and guests right on the mike and dragged me away.
Our generation parents have lost that grit and courage to stand up for out kids when they need it. We let schools take kids ransom to their tunes.
My only++
++advice is to not let that feeling continue.
There are a dime to dozen schools and taking up relevant issues with school management will not harm us. The most painful fact was that most fathers were 'too busy' to come and talk to principal. Mothers did not have the courage++
++ and when my husband, the lone father went to speak about it, one staff told him "looks like you are the only father concerned about your child. Rest of them are probably uploading pics on Social media."
This was close to 18 months ago and still my fingers shake as I type++
++ the whole thing.
Have we let the combined assault of metropolitanism and corporate pressures, not to talk of the stupid peer pressure kill the parents within us? The answer to this will define our future 🙏🏽🙏🏽.

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